And People Wonder Why I’m Always Pissed….

Hey. I haven’t even been eighteen for two weeks and my life is already spiraling back to the same hellish state it’s been for years. Freaking Amanda, my sister (she’s ten now), just can’t help herself from making up lie after lie about me to get me in trouble, and my parents just eat it up, because God forbid Sam ever be allowed to not be the “problem child.” Screw that. Seriously, how the hell am I supposed to coexist with these assholes if they don’t even let me try and be good?!

I’d been doing much better at controlling myself in the midst of all of this bullshit for awhile, but these past few days have been harder. I don’t know why. All I know is that I can’t wait to get my shit together and get the hell out of here. I’m so fucking tired of being the family scapegoat for fucking everything! It’s always my fault, somehow. Doesn’t matter if I’m in a different room, or not even home, everything always ends up back at me. Seriously, I can’t make this shit up. Fuck this.

And, of course, anyone who observes this always assumes that my parents are automatically right and always have some prior reason to be extra pissed off at me this time. I can’t even really vent to anyone because they always blame me! I want to scream and cry and punch holes into walls and kick down doors and a bunch of other super-destructive shit like taking a baseball bat and smashing shit, but it’s not like I can do any of that, and imagining karma coming back to bite them in their asses isn’t really cutting it anymore. One of these days I’m just gonna snap, and I don’t know what’s gonna happen then. I really don’t. It scares me, it truly does.

Fuck this shit.

-Sam

P.S. I’m not gonna kill myself or my family or anything (because apparently I need to clarify this). Honestly, I think that would be a cop-out. Really not my style. I’m more of a flip-’em-the-bird, fuck-you-all-I-succeeded-despite-all-of-your-bullshit person, anyway.

I’ve Officially Gotten A New Generation Hooked On Bones

Hey. As I said in my last post, I’ve started watching Bones. Well, more like I binge-watched all ten-and-a-half seasons during the second week of December and have been rewatching them ever since, but whatever. Anyways, a few weeks ago, my sister was hanging out with me in my room and I happened to be watching Bones on my Xbox 360, using the Netflix app. She asked what I was watching and I was like, “Oh my God, Mina, this is Bones, it’s so awesome, oh my God, here, let’s watch it from the beginning, we’ll start at the first episode of season one!” Ever since then, she’s been hooked, watching episodes on Netflix in her free time. Turns out, she also told all of her friends about Bones, too, and now they’re obsessed with it, too, and they told their friends and now I seem to have gotten an entirely new generation obsessed with Bones.

I kinda feel like I should be getting paid for this….

Anyways, I’m gonna end this post now. I know it’s pretty short, but I want to go set everything up for Camp NaNoWriMo , which is next month. Bye!

-Sam

Just To Clarify….

Hey. I know my last post may have seemed full of hatred toward my sister; however, that is not the case. While, yes, I was super pissed at her for acting the way she did and getting me into a shitload of trouble, I love her more than life itself. She’s my little sister and I would give my life for her in a heartbeat. She’s just a fucking asshole at times (but aren’t we all?).

Ugh. I’ve been sick literally this entire fucking month! I missed every single school day from Friday, October 30, through and including the entire next week. My first day back was last Monday. And, top it off, I’m fucking sick again! My throat is fucking killing me, and MY ENTIRE FUCKING BODY HURTS!! I can’t deal with this! Ugh!

-Sam

My Annoying, Manipulative, Conniving Little Sister

Hey. I’m back, hopefully for good this time. I’ve been neglecting this for well over a year now, and I’ve come to realize just how soothing it really is to post all of my shit here. God, where do I even start…?

Well, I suppose I’ll start with right now. My fucking sister, Amanda. She’s nine now. I’ve never been anywhere near as fucking pissed off at her as I am at this moment and have been recently. My mom brought my two brothers to football practice, where my dad already was, so me and Amanda were gonna stay home alone. She was to do her homework and I was to do mine. Okay, sure. Fair enough. Right?

Yeah, well, literally the second my mom closes the front door, Amanda starts being bitchy. Her new ploy to get me in trouble is to pretty much make up a whole fucking argument with me in her head, where she’s actually yelling at me in real life but I’m still SILENTLY SITTING IN THE FUCKING RECLINER WHILE TYPING MY HOMEWORK. Remember, my mom hasn’t even been out of the house for a fucking minute yet. So I turn to look at her and say simply, “Do your homework.” I’m actually quite proud of myself for keeping myself so calm.

Anyways, she does that fucking little pretend gasp thing that you really only see the shallow, bitchy girl in all those stupid Disney movies do. “That’s it, I’M telling MOM!” So my sister seriously fucking sprints to the front door, rips it open, and runs out after my mom (who isn’t even in her fucking car yet!!), screaming how I’m already yelling at her and telling her to shut up.

Excuse me?!

Naturally, my mom believes the little conniving nine-year-old over her eldest, seventeen-year-old daughter who was left in charge and hadn’t moved an inch since she walked out the door. I hear her yell my name – “Samantha Rose Murphy, get out here right now!” – and I go over to the door just in time to get yelled at about how I better not give Amanda any crap and to just leave her alone. After about five or ten “OKAY, Mom!”s, my sister and I are back inside again and my mom gets in her car and drives away.

I tell Amanda, “Okay, you heard Mom, start getting that homework done.” What does she say to me in return, you ask? Why, a fierce “shut up!” of course. Taking a deep breath to try and keep my cool (which is definitely starting to slip by now), I say to her something along the lines of, enough with the attitude, I’m the babysitter, I’m in charge, just do your homework so I can leave you alone. “Don’t make me call Mom!” she threatens, and I’m almost unable to stop myself from laughing, but luckily I hold it in, telling her to go ahead, try it, before turning back to my computer.

She proceeds to search the house for the next five minutes, looking for one of our house phones. When she finds it, she calls my mom’s cell. The first time, she leaves a message, and is (no joke) in the middle of telling the answering machine how I screamed at her to shut up and how I’m just being a big jerk to her. I call over very, very calmly and tell her to stop making up stories. She SCREAMS at me “SHUT UP!!!!” while still talking to the answering machine and starts screaming/crying. You know, that screeching kids do when they’re trying to fake sob? Yeah, that.

She then redials my mom’s number. This time, my mom picks up. Amanda goes straight into her act, telling my mom, “Mooooooommmmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyy, Sammi’s being a big jerk! She’s yelling at me and calling me names and telling me to shut up!”

Which, might I remind you, is a total, 100% lie. Seriously. I am NOT making this up. Honestly? I wish I were….

My mom tells her to “put your sister on the phone right now!” Already having another handheld right next to me, I press talk and tell Amanda to hang up since I’m on with the other phone. Naturally, she yells “NO!” and of course my mom doesn’t care. She goes right into shouting at me to take my stuff and get into my room and don’t interact with Amanda and just leave her alone. I will admit that I reached my limit during this “conversation” (more like sentencing!) and snapped. I yelled at my mom over the phone, “She’s lying! Really, Mom, I’ve literally done nothing except tell her to do her homework and not be a little brat to me!”

My mom ends up screaming back at me, “I DON’T CARE, JUST GET INTO YOUR ROOM, AND IF I GET ANOTHER CALL I’M COMING BACK TO GET HER AND THERE WILL BE HELL TO PAY!!!” Of course, we exchange more than just that summarization, but you get the point. I hang up and proceed to my room where I very gently close the door so I don’t accidentally slam it in my anger.

Anyways, about ten, fifteen minutes later, my mom bangs on my door. I’m super confused and ask her “why are you here, you said you weren’t gonna get her unless there was another problem?” to which she responds “maybe just think about it!” Very meanly, might I add. She then proceeds to yell in my face (literally – her toes were touching mine) to make sure I shower, do the dishes, and send my homework to her (because God forbid I actually send it to just my teacher, right? Nooooooo, cuz I would totally be lying about that unless she fucking sees it which is stupid because she’s so fucking technologically inept I get in trouble because she doesn’t know how to fucking open and view my work anyways!!). She then wordlessly turns and slams the front door on her way out, refusing to acknowledge me asking “what the hell just happened?!?!” Of course, I don’t ask like that since I don’t swear at all in front of her, but still.

And so is the story of my life. I wish I could say this is a rare, even isolated occurrence, but, alas, it is not. Not even close. I have to deal with this shit every single day! Sometimes I’m actually stumped how I haven’t literally exploded and how my guts don’t cover the walls of my house yet.

I’ll try to start doing the whole blog thing regularly again. Like, I said, I miss you guys. Later.

-Sam

P.S. Oh yeah, and on top of everything else, I’ve been sick since early Friday morning. Yeah, like I even have the fucking energy to be a fucking asshole to you, Amanda….

School Tomorrow

Hey! Well, February vacation’s over, at least for me and my brothers (although I’m sure that they would disagree and tell me it’s not over until they get to school 🙂 )- my sister has tomorrow off, thanks to a teacher training day at her school. I’m happy to go back (like I used to be before those assholes at the public school started to bully me), except for the fact that I have a Dos quiz tomorrow. Which, by the way, quizzes are harder than tests. Alright, sorry for the short post, but there’s a request for a post (well, maybe not exactly a request, but I made it one 🙂 ) and I’m so excited that I’m going to start it now! Bye!

-Sam

Christmas Shopping Is Done!!

Hey! Thanks to Amazon and my Dad’s credit card (for the ordering- I’m paying for the stuff myself…), my Christmas shopping is D-O-N-E done! Yay! Now I can focus on other, “fun” things, like waiting for Christmas. Have I ever mentioned that I hate patience? WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD! If you are Mrs. Arruda, Mom, Dad, Ro, Mina, AJ, Uncle, Gabby, Rebecca, or Zach, do not, I repeat, do NOT read any further. Skip the rest of this post until after Christmas, since I will be in the middle of telling everyone what your gifts are. So, here we go. For Mrs. Arruda, we require a bit of a backstory. She is our school’s secretary, and she does, like, EVERYTHING! Well, her dad died last month, a couple weeks before Thanksgiving. When I went to his wake, I gave her a box. In it was a note (among two other things that I might say in another post). It said not to worry about her dad, because I knew he was in Heaven, since I saw two rainbows, one on each side of the sun, the day he died (I explained in the note how I read somewhere how everytime someone dies, God sends a rainbow to carry them to Heaven). Ever since then, she has been seeing rainbows everywhere. So, for Christmas, to get her into the Christmas spirit (she hasn’t been feeling it, understandably), I decided to give her a gift. It is a Kikkerland Window-Mount Solar-Powered Heart Rainbow Maker. Isn’t that a great idea?! I thought so. I just hope it isn’t late, since it is supposed to be in on Thursday, and Friday is the last school day of the year. Anyway, for Mom, I got a nice clear glass cross. For Dad, a Steelers fan, I got a Terrible Towel. For Ro (Roman), my brother, I got another Terrible Towel, plus a mini Statue Of Liberty. For Mina (Amanda), my sister, an I ❤ NY coin purse, a mini NY bell, and a mini Statue Of Liberty. For AJ, my brother, a Santa-In-The-Box, a mini NY bell, and a mini Statue Of Liberty. For Uncle, a serious Trekkie (like me 🙂 ), a replica Starfleet Command division badge. For Gabby, one of my best friends, a creeper (Minecraft) pendant necklace. For Rebecca, my other best friend and a lover of Lord Of The Rings, an action figure set with Bilbo, Thorin, Dwalin, Kili, and Fili. And for Zach, my cousin, a Patriots licence plate frame. Aren’t those great ideas?! Wow, this was a long post. I will end it here. Bye!

-Sam

New York And A Big Thank You To Bing And Grey’s Anatomy

Hey. Well, if there’s one good thing that came out of not airing a Grey’s Anatomy on Thanksgiving, it’s that a couple new people discovered my blog, thanks to them searching Bing for some answers as to if there was an episode or not. I would still rather have an episode to watch, but whatever. Also, I went to New York with Gabby and her mom and two of her mom’s friends on Sunday! It was so much fun! We just shopped, but I got my Christmas shopping done for my little brother A.J. and little sister Amanda. The train ride back was hilarious. Okay, I have to go read and make an outline for my history homework, then study for an art quiz tomorrow. Bye!

-Sam